Monday, March 24

these mother-fuckers "tagged" my car. my car is listed on their stupid website as "small and reasonably fuel efficient" (so, do not tag it) and they still did. fuckers. i hate them. i hate anyone who thinks their opinion gives them moral superiority or some right to damage other people's property. i encounter that all the time in san francisco, and it is why i will not live here longer than i have to. something infects these people's brain. they egg each other on, they think everyone in the world thinks the way they do, they crave "diversity" and difference of opinion, yet if you offer one they react with open hostility. its sad to see such a great city brimming with such insanity.

Tuesday, March 18

god…im just painfully boring lately. I have nothing to say. i get up. i got to work. i come home. i go to sleep. repeat. i dont have any stalkers. (well, not any major ones) i didnt get caught having sex in my sister's boyfriend's bed. im not afraid my lover's wife will find out about us. i dont have major drama in my life, and i totally dont want any.

- ive been exercising like crazy in the labs lunchtime classes which work out great, my favorite being the weightlifting.
- im trying to decide if my love of san francisco is theoretical or not - the thought of reading the Tri-Valley Herald while waiting for my table to come up at Chili's makes me cringe.
- im preparing for parents weekend when dave and my world's collide.

im totally boring. i know it.

Friday, March 14

um...that was my stapler....um...i was told i would have my stapler...um...theres mouse crap in here...um...my stapler

Thursday, March 13

and i just found mouse crap on my desk.

what in the fuck?

the other day my boss told me to let him know if i was planning to quit. the funny thing is, he didnt say it because he has evidence of such a thing. he said it because people here tend to quit after they've passed their year-long "toughing it out" phase and are still confined to sitting alone stuffed in a remote a corner of a remote building, some days not even seeing another person, let alone having a conversation. "oh, you know...let me know if you dont think you cant take it anymore." i think those were his exact words. im not exactly sure what he would do if i did let him know. (what he could do?) can he do one of those: *poof* - you job suddenly is bearable - kinda things? he'll offer me more RAM for my compuer. gee. thanks. i swear to fucking god, that has happened before.

Tuesday, March 11

i can tell you everything you want to know about a mortgage. i can tell you -to the penny- how much fatter your paycheck will be. i know what "last dollar" means. i can re-calculate with pre-payments and i can do a little dance afterwards. what i cant seem to do is convince myself to move here rather than here. it would save me ...ohhh....a quarter of a million dollars. that freaks me out. quarter of a million dollars. quarter of a million dollars. i really really really want a house. im looking for the ugliest, nastiest, mirror-walled, pastel pink painted, cheap-o house. the more cat-trees the better.

Friday, March 7

wow. tomorrow is my one-year blogaversary. happy blogaversary, blog. tomorrow you are one.

A day in the government lab, part III

her email (in full): I need proxy for your 3PR14 Reg Fee
me: Can you tell me what this is in regard to? And to what would you like a proxy?
her: you submitted a 121 form. You must go into extensity go to user, the proxy and enter my employee number....
me: You'll have to forgive me because I still dont understand what you are talking about. I haven't submit any forms. I have NO IDEA what you are talking about???



Seriously. This stuff just writes itself.

Wednesday, March 5

I’m so hungry. I’m just totally fixated on food - unusual things, too, its not like a sweet tooth but like a hamburger with ketchup. mmmm, ketchup. i have a total and complete love affair with condiments. in high school i submit an entry (and was accepted) into one of those books of compiled quotes about life from people of all ages. my entry was about ketchup and it read:

"all food is just an
excuse to eat ketchup"
-claudia, age 17.

ketchup isnt even my favorite. A-1 is my favorite. i could drink it straight out of the bottle. We can eat steak on this diet, I picked up a couple and just couldn’t enjoy it. Its just not the same without A-1. another thing I want is something to drink. Anything. I am so damn sick of water. Water water water. Green tea, no sugar, no milk, water. No diet coke. Mmmmm, diet coke. Put me in a room with A-1 and diet coke, and im happy. Not diet pepsi. (im thinking of switching my frequent flier allegiance from United over to American based on United’s Pepsi policy alone. (and the whole bankruptcy thing))